DIANE | Kirkus Reviews

An abuse survivor shares her harrowing journey and recovery in this posthumous memoir.

Diane, whose last name is not given to protect her family’s privacy, grew up in the idyllic village of Guildford, England, an experience she describes as “sort of a Norman Rockwell lifestyle.” At age 9, her world turned upside down when she found out her doting mom and dad were foster parents, and that her biological mother, Sharon, had come from the United States to retrieve her and her brother, David. “I was just devastated,” Diane recalls, “realizing that everything was a lie.” In addition to the psychological trauma and loss of her childhood identity, Diane was thrust into a new American culture during a period of civil unrest in 1969. Though Diane, David, and Sharon were white, Sharon’s partner at the time was Black, and the family lived in a predominantly African American neighborhood in the South Bronx. Though stories of culture shock told from the perspective of a white English girl growing up in a Black neighborhood offer keen lessons on race in the U.S., the book’s early chapters center on trauma. By 1972, as Diane retells in the book’s shocking prologue, she contemplated murdering her allegedly abusive mother and stepfather but decided to run away instead. Soon Diane’s life had spiraled to rock bottom, and she was pregnant at 14.

Lassoe’s work paints a disturbing story of abuse, neglect, and generational trauma. It is, however, fundamentally a story of survival, hope, and reconciliation. The father of Diane’s first child, for instance, reappeared in her life having overcome his heroin addiction. The author’s brother, David, who also lived on the streets for a while, was protected by a pair of drag queens. Diane forgave her biological mother following their reunion in her adulthood. In a remarkable story of compassion and forgiveness, Diane took care of Sharon during her dying days. Author Lassoe first met Diane while the two were graduate students together more than a decade ago when Diane first shared her story with him during a classroom assignment. Based on hours of recorded interviews with Diane, Lassoe weaves together her trauma-fueled story into a cohesive narrative. A practicing psychotherapist, Lassoe shares Diane’s vision to provide inspiration to readers who seek to change the story of their own lives from “one of challenge and hardship to one of grace and forgiveness.” Published posthumously after Diane’s 2022 death, Lassoe obtained permission from her family to proceed with publication of their book. Written in first-person, the book’s writing style takes Diane’s stream-of-consciousness, conversational interviews to create a chronological, well-edited story. In addition to the power of Diane’s personal journey, this book is also a model of how to be true to oral history source material while crafting a readable story that shapes disjointed memories into a tight narrative. Even while readers may not identify with the author’s personal faith, the book is never preachy, despite its overtly religious overtones in later chapters. The text is accompanied by a wealth of snapshot photographs taken throughout Diane’s life.

A sobering, powerful story of overcoming devastating childhood trauma.